I've done this before

It's 5:30 am, and I was just thinkin about it. I figured I haven't written in a while and I might as well do it.

My other lists have been rather unserious/cruel/offensive, so this one is going to be sweet, real, legit, and from the heart.

My Perfect Girl

We all know that the "perfect" significant other doesn't exist, but I think my list is general enough that I can cover at least 95% of it when it comes down to selecting someone.

Physical:
-Height: Tall. I'd like my girl to be as tall as me. I know that girls like guys taller, but I don't even think i'd mind if my girl was a little bit taller then me. I honestly find tall girls to be hot as hell. There's a couple in my classes right now, and man, the one is GORGEOUS. If not as tall as me, i'll settle for a couple inches shorter, at least tall enough where I can kiss her on her forehead without having to bend tilt my head down at all.

-Weight: See, weight is funny, because this is something alterable without surgery. I can't handle extremes though, girl's that weigh more then me. no. I mean, this is for practicality too. I want to be able to carry my girl on our wedding night. I can't carry no fat girl. Also, girls that look like they wind can blow them away? no. If i had to choose though, i'd go skinny rather then fat. Fattening up a girl would be more fun then trying to force tubby to jog.

-Hair: I'm a long hair kind of guy. The pony tail and baseball cap, sexy girl next door tomboy things hits a sweet spot in me somewhere (won't say where). I also like subtlely curly hair.

-Fashion: I like girls that know how to make anything look sexy. I mean, there are girls who just know how to put on a pair of sweatpants and bring in all the boys from the yard. I guess this is kind of moot, because i'm assuming the girl i fall in love with will look beautiful to me no matter what.

Psychological:
-Nature: I like light hearted girls who know what how to throw out the jokes, but know when to be serious. I like a girl who's is naturally a homebody but when you suggest going somewhere, they are up for it no matter what. Even if it's something she doesn't want to do, she'll do it anyway just because she knows I want to.

-Intelligence: I don't mind my girl being smarter then me. If she knows alot before going into a relationship with me, that's cool, I can learn from her. If she's just one of those people who has a thirst for knowledge, that's cool too, I can learn with her. All I want is for her to be witty and have really good common sense. If i throw out a random one liner, I want them to be able to fire something back just as quick.

-Habits: I need someone organized. And I don't mean obsessive compulsive organized like everythign has to be in a certain drawer and labeled properly. I mean organized like... the pile in the near corner is for clean clothes, the pile in the far corner is for dirty clothes. That's as far as my organizational skills go. I mean, she has to be organized in the sense that she always puts the same things in the same place. She must also like cooking, or at least, have good tastes in bad food. I don't have the wallet or willpower to go to fancy restaurants all day long just because she suddenly gets a craving to have some sushi that's three hours away and won't settle for anything else. I like my girl to be as happy with TV dinners and ramen as she is with fine cuisine.

Interests:

-Gaming: My girl must like some form of video games. I don't care if she's good or great. She just has to have interest. I mean, I play alot of video games, and I would like to be able to share my experience with her. So if she doesn't play, she at least has to understand what i'm talking about.

-Sports: My girl has to enjoy physical activity on some level other then watching. This could be basketball, tennis, golf, or something, anything. Like I said, I don't care if she can do it well, but I want to be able to do something like... surfing, and she'll be happy to tag along. I don't want no girl that'll whine and say it's too hard without even giving it a try. If she tries it and then decides it's too hard for her, that's cool, at least she was willing to try it.

-Entertainment: I'm a big movie watcher, and I like to follow TV shows that are worth following. My girl will not give a care about stupid realities shows that are played out. She will like interesting shows. She will also like all forms of movies.

-Cars: She must have some level of competency in terms of cars. I don't mind her not feeling confident about changing the oil or whatever, but she has to know enough about how a car works and at least know how to change a flat tire by herself. I want to be able to feel secure knowing that if she's driving at 2 in the morning, she'll be able to get home safely. She must be able to identify car symptoms to the point where she knows if she has to stop on the side of the road and call for help, or if it's safe enough to keep driving. She has to be able to go to a mechanic and verify if the diagnosis of the mechanic is real or if he's just trying to rip her off. She doesn't have to know this going into the relationship, but again, she has to be willing to learn these things. Oh, she also has to be able to identify tools, because someone has to pass them to me when i'm underneath my car fixing it. =)

That's it. Sorry for the essay. Let's put it this way, i probably won't be posting again for a while, so divide it up into sections. Make it last as long as possible so that you'll still be here when i post again.

Google's new e-mail system

Gmail seems pretty cool. You can check it out at http://gmail.google.com.

They're offering a gigabyte of space. That's unheard of. I haven't really tried it out yet, I figure i'll slowly migrate all my mail to gmail, but I want to see how it actually works, stores emails, attachments, etc.

Leave a comment if you use gmail and tell me the pros and cons.

My Birthday Wishlist:

Due to popular demand: (as in, people saying "I dunno what to get you for your bday that's not worth a grand")

PS2 Games: I only have six... FFX, GT3, GTA3, HoMM, Tekken 4, and Devil May Cry 2. I like driving games, rpgs, and fast paced games I can enjoy during a 15 minute break or whatever.
Gameboy SP: I always wanted one. You can even dusche it up and give me a GBA game, forcing me to buy an SP.
Subscription to car magazine: I can usually find free mag subscriptions to all the Maxim-alikes and console game mags.. but car mags are hard to pull. I prefer Sports Compact Car, but hey, if you got me Car and Driver or anything, I probably wouldn't complain
Car Parts: Surprisingly enough, not everything is 500+ dollars.. I mean, most are.. but there are things you could get away with if you chipped in with a friend or something... Boost controller, fuel pump, spark plug wires, strut bar, etc. 92 Eagle Talon Tsi AWD. (just in case you want to consider this [please?])
CD's: I need new music for my car, and i'm too lazy to burn shit these days. Personally I like real cd's anyway. So suck it RIAA, you're wrong about people just burning music.. you forgot we're LAZY. Also, books on tape would be cool. Harry Potter or LotR would be interesting on those long drives.
New keyboard/mouse: My shit is getting old... I love my keyboard, but I wouldn't mind junking it to get a nice logitech one with some nice ergonomics and maybe some cool features. no wireless though! I'm a conservative by nature and I don't like jumping into that kind of technology yet.
New wallet: My ass has ripped my current one to shreds. Please though, single fold wallets with places for CC and license. I don't like trifolds.. feel too bulky on my buttocks.
Headwear: A plain looking fitted cap in white, tan or blue. My big head needs 7 3/4 I think... be safe, go BIGGER.
A new freakin computer chair: Mine is broken. All I need is a chair that can roll, has armrests and can lean back. Adjustable height would be nice too.

And lots of things I can't afford, ask me for more details!

Banned list:
No more spiderman products.
No more generic birthday cards.
No more empty hands with no presents.

This is nothing more then an overglorified version of what's on my profile, but hey, you read, i give. That's how it works.

Operation Talon Storm

I will fix my car today. I will drive.

Then I will cry with all the homework and other shit I have to do.

Cry.

My effin friend Joe

Joe is my friend. Joe just got back from Iraq (though he's goin back in two weeks). I tell Joe i'm going to visit him. I says "Joe, i'm coming to visit you, SIR". Joe says ok.

I drive an hour down to the southern end of delaware with Joe's incomplete directions. I said I would call him when I get to his neighborhood and he can direct me. I get to Joe's place. Joe is sleeping. Joe does not pick up the phone. I get mad at Joe.

I am in Joe's neighborhood, without his address, just wandering. Joe's sister picks up Joe's cellphone. She says hold on, I'll wake him up. Joe doesn't wake up. I don't get his address. Joe continues to not pick up the phone. Thank you useless sister.

Finally as a last resort, I call Tata (one of my favorite girl's by the way) and she just so happen to remember Joe's street name. With some blind luck, we managed to stumble across Joe's house buried deep within a residential complex. Luckily Joe drives a car that's fairly easy to spot (Toyota Matrix).

Joe was still sleeping when we went inside.

Two Knights Ago

Brian Taylor's Birthday was this past weekend. We celebrated by going to Medieval Times.

Tron went too:


We were cheering for the blue knight:


We watched him outperform all the other knights:


Our knight died.

Summary of All Knights

Blue, AKA Our hero: He was the coolest of the knights. He kept doin this half smirk "i'm too suave" kind of thing. He was the only one who looked like he could be a knight.

Yellow, AKA The Douchebag: Yellow just sucked. I mean, we might have been biased because he was Blue's enemy, but it seemed like Yellow blew it every chance he got. Blue also killed him. Yay.

Black and White, AKA Priest: He was pretty pimp. I dunno if he was like catholic or whatever, cuz damn, he was evil.

Red and Yellow, AKA The Ghetto Knight: He was black and his dreadlocks made him look like broccoli in his armor. He pimped it out a few times and showed how he runned things in the hood... before he was slained.

Red, AKA The CRIMSON EVIL: Man, he was all trying to kill people and stuff, and then Blue bitchslapped him... with a sword in the stomach.

Green, AKA The Fuckin Slacker: I mean, I can understand it when a knight is suppose to be some "mercenary for hire and has no loyalties" but that bitchass looked like a college student waiting for his paycheck. AND he got the princess.

Yup, that was my weekend... well, besides making fun of Tron for being Jewish and eating lots and lots of yeast rising products in front of his face during Easter dinner.

Happy Birthday Brian.

You're not getting a present from me.

Bitch.

Too Busy for words

You know that a person like me is busy when I don't even have time to post in my blog. I mean, I post all the time, and for me to not post would mean that I'm DYING.

Reasons for DYING:

1. Physics homework nightly.
2. Programming in concepts I don't understand in a language I am not familiar with
3. Trying to fix my car... still.
4. Trying to get this gig.
5. Other homework from classes.
6. Classes.

Divide up the week evenly among those six things, add in time to sleep and still do things that I want to do and you'll probably get a number that is more then the hours available in any given week.

So Dear Fans,
Gone fishin,
Be back whenever I stop dying.

¿Mystified Weekend Update?

Unfortunately, with everything that has happened lately, this blog has been pushed onto the back burner. The only reason it's getting updated right now is because it's 5:30 in the morning. Finally found a moment to just sit down and ponder.

So what better way to ponder then a weekend update?

Friday: Woke up incredibly late, drove 2 hours to Mitsubishi Parts store even though it's only 10 miles away. Got back, watched some Naruto and then drove to jersey. Worked on my car at Paul's house. Cried as things decided not to work. Laterwards, Paul and I met up with beautiful Hanna and my brotha Esther. We went to eat and then went to En Are Be.

Saturday: Woke up incredibly late. Everybody and their mom decided to call me between 11 and 2. I finally gave up and woke up after sleeping some more and being woken up again. After getting up, decided to do some more work on the car. Made some progressed, decided to quit while I was ahead. Drove Paul to get things at walmart, drove back to philly. Met up with Tron, met up with Terry, met up with myself, went home, bought shoes, I am pimp roight thar.

Sunday: It's not really sunday yet, but not quite saturday anymore.

It's like a senseless void... like the shit between your ears.

I was just kidding yesterday.

The new issue of Virtually Infamous Magazine is up.. but if you're reading this, then you probably already saw that.

The blog's template will be redesigned later. Use it as a comparison of what the page used to look like.

And remember, laugh, because the world isn't funny without you.