The Bird Curse

I was looking out in my backyard like I always do, and I was watching the fuckin annoying birds as they chirped in the trees. This one bird had some kind of bread chunk in its beak and it landed on the ground to break it up. As soon as the bread crumb fell from its mouth, the other birds swarmed in trying to grab it. Well, the first bird picked it back up and flew away. I just had to laugh.

Imagine if humans were like that. I'd order a sub from the food truck as I chill with my friends and you know, it's in my one hand while i have a bottled drink in the other. So I would have to put down my sub to take a sip... and then suddenly everyone around me would swarm at my sub trying to grab it. That would piss me off. I'd hate to have to grab my sub and run down the street just to eat it.

Luckily we humans aren't like birds. I mean, we have hands. That makes us way better then birds. Fuckin birds, pecking in the dirt, scavaging for bread crumbs and fighting each other for scraps. God is a funny man. He's like, alright birds, you can be the only things on the earth that can fly naturally, but that's it, you don't get anything else. Go. Fly you fuckin handless beaked shits.

I dunno if i would give up what I have just to be able to fly.