My 700th post aka Posting Twice in one day aka The Art of Cigarette Bumming
Since when was it culturally acceptable to bum cigarettes from strangers? I mean, I do it, so I'm not going to say it's gay, but I really want to know why it is acceptable to do so. You don't go around asking people for candy if they have some. You don't ask them for their car keys if they're about to drive. You don't ask them for a piece of their pretzel if you just so happen to pass someone eating one.
So why cigarettes? I don't know. But if it's going to be accepted, I think there should be some rules.
1) You have to be a smoker who randomly offers aquantences or people you just met a cigarette when you go to light one. This makes it acceptable for you to ask others for cigarettes because you're the type of person who's willing to give them out.
2) Take what you can get. Don't bitch or put on that stupid grossed out face when someone gives you an Ultra-light and you usually smoke Reds. How are you going to bum a cigarette and not at least act grateful?
3) Offer money or some other form of compensation. Cigarettes aren't cheap. It's like 25 cents and up for an individual cigarette. Most people won't mind giving away a cigarette for nothing if they at least know you're willing to pay for it. Or as this one guy did, he told me he worked at a nearby bar and told me that if I ever came in, he'd hook me up.
4) Feel really really bad for asking. I hate people who ask for a cigarette and then when you say you don't have one, or shoot them a look like they're crazy, they get all upset and angry like you owe them one or something. No I don't, and maybe if you didn't act like you're demanding one, i'd give one to you.
5) If you're asking for a cigarette, don't ask for a light too unless you're being offered one. What the hell is that, you're a smoker and you're bumming a cigarette, but you don't have a lighter? Would you like a drink too?
6) Spend a moment of your time saying thanks. Hey do you have a cigarette? Thanks dude. *walk away* That's gay. You're gay. Don't be gay. At least spend a moment having a conversation. "Thanks for the cigarette. I haven't smoked all day and haven't had time to get my own pack yet. You saved me". That's a good one. It could be a lie but hey, make the person giving you a cig feel good for giving away his own stuff.
You have been schooled. Again.
Since when was it culturally acceptable to bum cigarettes from strangers? I mean, I do it, so I'm not going to say it's gay, but I really want to know why it is acceptable to do so. You don't go around asking people for candy if they have some. You don't ask them for their car keys if they're about to drive. You don't ask them for a piece of their pretzel if you just so happen to pass someone eating one.
So why cigarettes? I don't know. But if it's going to be accepted, I think there should be some rules.
1) You have to be a smoker who randomly offers aquantences or people you just met a cigarette when you go to light one. This makes it acceptable for you to ask others for cigarettes because you're the type of person who's willing to give them out.
2) Take what you can get. Don't bitch or put on that stupid grossed out face when someone gives you an Ultra-light and you usually smoke Reds. How are you going to bum a cigarette and not at least act grateful?
3) Offer money or some other form of compensation. Cigarettes aren't cheap. It's like 25 cents and up for an individual cigarette. Most people won't mind giving away a cigarette for nothing if they at least know you're willing to pay for it. Or as this one guy did, he told me he worked at a nearby bar and told me that if I ever came in, he'd hook me up.
4) Feel really really bad for asking. I hate people who ask for a cigarette and then when you say you don't have one, or shoot them a look like they're crazy, they get all upset and angry like you owe them one or something. No I don't, and maybe if you didn't act like you're demanding one, i'd give one to you.
5) If you're asking for a cigarette, don't ask for a light too unless you're being offered one. What the hell is that, you're a smoker and you're bumming a cigarette, but you don't have a lighter? Would you like a drink too?
6) Spend a moment of your time saying thanks. Hey do you have a cigarette? Thanks dude. *walk away* That's gay. You're gay. Don't be gay. At least spend a moment having a conversation. "Thanks for the cigarette. I haven't smoked all day and haven't had time to get my own pack yet. You saved me". That's a good one. It could be a lie but hey, make the person giving you a cig feel good for giving away his own stuff.
You have been schooled. Again.
posted by Allen M @ 5/24/2004 03:59:00 PM
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