I'd like to be a ghostwriter for a stand up comic. I mean, I think I would do alright as one myself, but I have a tendency to stumble on words, maybe even a little soft-spoken at times (gasp, me soft spoken?? no way!). Bah, maybe i'll grace you all with a "skit" someday. I have it all planned out in my head.

Today's topic is habitual rituals (hey, that rhymes!). Do you ever notice that there are just certain things that you MUST do in the day or you just have an anxiety attack?

My rituals
I must brush my teeth and wash my face before leaving the house: Though I do on occasion, leave the house without doin so, I get extremely paranoid at bad breath. And if I don't wash my face, it feel like i'm going to break out like mold on an old big mac.

I must put on my seat belt before driving: To me, if I do not, it feels like i'm not part of the car, and therefore, can be thrown around like a four year old step-child.

I must wear socks with shoes: It just feels all grimey. My sweaty feet need some absorbtion processes.

I must have my cellphone on me at all times: I feel so detached from the world if it's not with me. I feel like it would just be my luck to receive an important phonecall (from a random hot girl who wants to have a one night stand with me... or something) in that time period when I don't have the phone. Odd really, cuz when i'm at my house, I usually forget my phone in my room... which is when everyone is trying to call me.

I must wash my hands after going to the bathroom: I hate peeing outdoors, in porta potties, or... in a girl's mouth... cuz, jeez, I just gotta wash my hands. Feels like germs are crawling all over me, and then I'm going to touch my face with the hand that just touched my penis? No. Can't do it. That's why I can never understand people who don't wash their hands.

There's probably a whole bunch of alotta more along those lines.. but it's late, and I'm sure you get the point.

Think of your own. Post them on the forum.