This week has been a really weird week for me... I almost want to say that I've never been happier... but I can't. I feel like I can't let myself, because something will go wrong and ruin it for me. Something always does. My life is like a Ferris Wheel... Just when I feel like I've reached the top.. and I have the best view in the world... I start to go back down again. Then, there are the times, when the ferris wheel stops to let more people in.. and you're just hanging there... If it were at the top.. it would be best... But I never get to stop at the top.

I met this girl.. and she's adorable. When she talks... all i want to do is listen, to sit there and close my eyes... and just... listen. It's weird... I never felt that way... I always wanted to be heard.. to let others know who I am and what i do... but no.. not her. She makes me feel different.

But it feels like the calm before the storm... though my body and spirit are relaxed... My mind is going crazy... too many thoughts.. not enough braincells... I feel overloaded.. Great.. more white hairs. I don't need anymore white hairs.

So there is nothing left to say, but to let fate pull my chain and tell me where to go. The ferris wheel is rising fast... There's only two possibilities after that.